Five Years

I met Benny when I was 21.

Scratch that. I met him a year before that... but at the time, neither of us were at a place in our lives where we recognized a kindred soul. Nevermind a good thing when we saw it.

By the time I was 21, both of our souls were a bit more open to each other. I remember that our first kiss was September 18, 1998. This was a long, long, LONG time before our first date. Cuz that's how we roll.

But yea, September 18, 1998..... that date has been burned into my memory. I remember the exact date because the next day, I headed north to Idaho State to watch our football team play ISU. Benny was redshirting due to an injury at the time, and when we saw each other in the stands, it was a bit uncomfortable. Neither of us really knew what to do... we had embarked on this little journey with the title of "Friends". But we both kinda knew that our friendship would never be the same. So, we gave the standard high-five and nervous giggle which is the equivalent to the Walk of Shame in terms off awkwardness. Yea... we were really sly. Our friends couldn't POSSIBLY figure out something was going on. Right.

It took about a year before we both came to our senses and decided that this was it. Well, for the most part, anyway. We dated all through our senior year of college. Benny was the guy everyone liked. And I was the girl that was one of the guys. But Benny... he was the first guy who didn't treat me like one of the guys... which was why I didn't know quite what to make of him. I had never had a "boyfriend" (shocking, I know)... and actually shuddered and refused to use that word to describe him for, oh, about three years. Benny was Benny. I'm not so much into labels.

The pic below is the very first picture of us together. I'm not exactly sure why he was at the lake that day. I remember very specifically I was with a couple of my gurls and we were discussing the rules for the Boys Don't Like Me Club, and what requirements we would, um... require. And, this is not a joke.... we were writing said requirements on a Cap'n Crunch box that we had turned inside out. Yep. Did I mention we were 21?

I was a founding member of the club, and - being born to the position of President - my vote counted as double. And I was discussing with the VP and the Ambassador what the Roberts Rules of Order entailed when Benny walked up and sat down next to me.

And right then and there, I was stripped of my Presidency. This photo was taken as proof for the rest of the club. It was posted in the clubhouse under the header: IMPEACHED! It took years for me to forgive him.

But, for the next five years, Benny and I were - with the exception of a few months here and there - inseparable. Of course, there were ups. There were downs. There were days when we didn't see or speak to each other. And not because we were mad or anything. We were just living our lives... and our significant other? Not a priority. We didn't know where it was heading, we just knew that when we were together, things were right. The noise stopped. The outside world didn't matter. We spoke to each other's souls. Most of the time, without having to say a word. But, still... we were not a priority. Because at this point in our lives, we were pretty much BRILLIANT.

In 2001, Benny moved to Phoenix for a job. To say I was devastated would be like saying I was a little nervous around Dooce last night... you know, when I drooled on myself. I remember going home the day he left, crawling into bed and thinking that staying in bed for the rest of my life would be just fine with me.

Benny moved back about nine months later, and we finally got our act together and decided that we'd been apart from each other enough. Of course, I tried not to pressure him to get married... but geez! We'd been dating for four years which in Utah Standard Time is actually 15 years. Let's get on with it, already.

We were married June 7, 2003. Five years ago today.


Benny,
The last five years have been the best of my life. I never knew true happiness until I met you. I never knew true peace. I love you with all my heart and soul and cannot imagine my life without you. And, to this day, I still cannot believe you chose me. I cannot believe you continue to put up with me on a regular basis. You make me laugh. You lift my spirit. You are the kindest, most thoughtful person I have ever had the opportunity to take advantage of. You encourage me to be better every day. Sometimes I succeed. Sometimes I fail. But always, I know that you're there for me. You are my heart. You are my soul. You are everything I never realized existed, everything that I never knew was possible. And everything I always wanted.

I have no idea how the two of us found each other. Was it God? Was it fate? Was it our souls recognizing each other before our physical beings could figure it out? Why in the world would you choose to leave Arizona to go to school? Why did I choose Weber State over Idaho State? What happened to my rule of staying far, far away from football players? More importantly, how in the world could you see past my gangsta baggy clothes to the potential girly-girl (we're still working on that) inside?

You have become a hero of mine... even though I don't really believe in having heros. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for showing me everything that is possible. You have taught me that the impossible? No. Such. Thing. Thank you for being you and not being afraid of being you... for letting your heart show no matter what.

You are my best friend and I will always, always love you.

In the last five years, we've experienced some pretty amazing things. You've changed the direction of your life, and in doing so, have changed mine. You've finished not one, not two, but three Ironmen. Which has given me about three heart-attacks when you've been out on the course. You let me cross the finish line with you. And on this last one, changed the direction of our lives, yet again.

We've been to Hawaii twice. I've jumped off South Point twice. Which gave you a heart-attack. Twice. We went deep-sea fishing in Hawaii, and you let me bring in the first (and only) fish.

We've been to New York and Boston... and we both agreed that Boston so TOTALLY rules. And that if we ever have the chance, our kids will go to Harvard. Whether they want to or not.

We went to Europe last summer and had the trip of a lifetime. We ate Gelato in Venice. We hiked the Swiss Alps. We offended all sorts of French people. We felt robbed when we went to London and experienced first-hand the exchange rate. We went to parades in Belgium and on a cruise of Lake Geneva. We ended up in France quite by accident and celebrated that little discovery with some ice cream. We went to Amsterdam and walked all over that city. We saw Ann Frank's house. We had our bags tossed by a German customs agent that I thought was going to kill us. We danced in San Marcos Plaza. We ate more margharita pizza than should be legal. We rode on the high-speed train to Paris. We ate lunch in Italy with our feet dangling in the Adriatic Sea. We ate lunch at the top of the Swiss Alps in a revolving restaurant. For HOURS. We saw a stabbing at a pub in England. Which was AWESOME. We rode through the Chunnel, and both decided that it was pretty.... dark. We met so many wonderful people and saw so many wonderful things, that we never wanted to come home. (Until we went to Paris, that is).

It doesn't matter where we are though, home is always with each other so we could have stayed there forever.

You heard me, I mean really heard me when I told you that I'd like to go sky diving. I still can't believe that you got me a gift certificate to go sky diving on my 30th birthday. (And, one of these days, I'm going to use that and give you your third heart-attack so that we'll finally be even). Last month, you finished your Master's thesis... after three years of hard work. And I couldn't have been more proud of you if you had stopped global warming.

Together, we've ridden our bikes 55-miles to my hometown... and I did it without crying. Mostly. With you as my support system, I finished my first (and last) marathon last year. A few months later, I finished a half-Ironman.

This was never what I thought my life would be... never what I thought I deserved. I cannot thank you enough for it. And I cannot wait, absolutely CAN. NOT. WAIT. to see what the next five years bring. I know whatever it is, were going to enjoy it.

Together.

Love you,
Nytro